Something I don’t think I’ve written about all that much is the rope high. And when it can creep in unexpectedly.
Recently, I was doing a session of rope practice with a new person, which is an interesting time, because a good part of the session is spent in education. This teaching thing just keeps on going, even outside of the blog!
I was doing the whole “Risk aware, consensual kink” (RACK) process; discussing the possible issues that some people experience with rope (mostly around nerve tinglys) the risks, how the risks are catered to and fixed, and so on. The person was pretty on board and understanding of all that. Then we got into actual practice.
And that was just a blast. I practiced using different kinds of rope, cotton and jute, doing different ties, explaining why I did particular things and not others, or why I used particular knots and not others, as I did so. It was familiar from explaining things from the book or the blog, and fun because I was actually DOING the things whilst talking about it.
Now, here’s the thing. When I’m practicing with a new person, I’m generally not out to seduce them. That would be pretty unethical, unless they and I were already into each other.
I’m deliberately focusing on mechanics and tying without adding in all that extra sensuality, and deliberately not provoking additional reactions. Almost feels counter-intuitive, but you gotta be ethical about what you do and why you do it, or you end up being a shit person and feeling like a shit person, and that’s no good for anyone.
But even without all that additional reaction getting and sensuality etc, a rope high managed to creep in as I went.
For me, it feels like a very gradually increasing feeling of confidence and of gradually accumulating euphoria, creeping in, gradually building the longer I tie and the more I experience successful results.
You get that sense of flow – of being absorbed in what you’re doing, as you design and re-design different ties, as you produce successful outcomes and your movement smooths out. I find that about ten to fifteen minutes into a practice, my rope handling becomes a lot smoother, which means my rope tying speeds up a little bit, and that sense of flow increases.
After about an hour and a half of practice, that feeling of euphoria has increased to the point that I feel actually buzzed, and I’m sitting down leaning against the wall feeling slightly giddy, and my new practice partner is highly amused. Perhaps it’s time to call it quits for now and save some additional ties for next time.
And that’s just with practice; nice, safe, non-intimate practice.
I know we all have an intoxicating time when we’re doing this stuff for real, with the goal being intimacy and just a really hot time – but do you guys find that this happens during practice as well?
I find that the buzz typically lasts about 30 minutes to an hour, but can be shortened if I go and eat something – kind of grounds me and brings me back. It’s a very interesting time, and requires no alcohol at all!
Yay rope!
On a side note, I was wondering if I could ask you guys a favor.
A few of my customers have left reviews on my book page, which was very pleasant – It’s actually really great being able to host reviews about my book on my own site, rather than having them get outsourced to Amazon or Goodreads. Feels more personal, you know?
For those of you who have bought my book, or are planning to buy my book, I’d like to ask you to add your own impressions to my book page here.
Those reviews let people know what to expect, which is really helpful for them, and they provide great constructive feedback, which is really helpful for me.
It takes an extra few seconds of your time, and it makes a big difference for me and for others.
Thanks, guys. I appreciate it 🙂
